Ted and Tunnock’s

March 31, 2009

To have swallowed a Crocodile/ Would make anybody smile/ But to swallow a Caramel wafer/ Is safer

To have swallowed a Crocodile/ Would make anybody smile/ But to swallow a Caramel wafer/ Is safer. Spotted and snapped in the Museum of the University of St Andrews

Here is a rather delightful poem, penned upon a Tunnock’s Caramel Wafer wrapper, by none other than Ted Hughes. Poet Laureate from 1984 – 98, he came to put pen to Tunnock’s wrapper and we can only ponder why? Of course, the muse can strike at any time, perhaps particularly post-prandially. Is that what napkins are really for?

Speaking of the Poet Laureate, ‘Spring 2009 sees the launch of a landmark commitment to literature with a pan-BBC season dedicated to poetry’. Whee! This is to include such gems as Ian Hislop welcoming the new laureate ‘with an entertaining history of one of the oldest and, he argues, oddest offices in the British establishment’; Griff Rhys-Jones on ‘Why Poetry Matters’ (preaching to the choir, Griff!), and ‘Off By Heart’ – primary school children across the country take part in a nationwide recitation competition (like the wonderful film Spellbound, but with poetry?), culminating in a grand final, compered by Jeremy Paxman. What could be better!

Speaking of Tunnock’s, it’s time for tea and Julie’s bought a lemon drizzle cake.

5 Responses to “Ted and Tunnock’s”


  1. I remember reading about Tunnocked Ted in, of all places, the Daily Record many years ago. I can’t remember the details, but I’m hazily remembering a visit he made somewhere and then donating it…

  2. John-o Says:

    It reminds me of a little poem by Spike Milligan:

    I’m not frightened of Pussy Cats,
    They only eat up mice and rats,
    But a Hippopotamus
    Could eat the Lotofus!

    Quite surprised that Mr Hughes didn’t opt for one of the Fox’s range of biscuits; though I do love a Tunnocks!

  3. spl5 Says:

    I do love a bit of Spike Milligan! Thanks for bringing his majesty back to us John-o!


  4. […] their Poetry Season on the horizon, the BBC have thrown down a fabulous gauntlet: take a piece of boring and functional […]


  5. […] one person suggested “how about a big Iron-Man-style animatronic robot that looks like Ted Hughes? It could be 100ft high and go up and down the Royal Mile distributing flyers and cakes and reading […]


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